As we approach the end of the year, we’re taking a look back at some of the top rated products that we’ve reviewed.
The blog has only been running since May, so rather than actually break it down into the best toys released in 2014 – all of these products were bought, tested and enjoyed this year. Also, as we get closer to Christmas, you might be looking for gift ideas for that special man in your life and we’ve got you covered.
This year, we have reviewed a fair amount of ‘penis-centric’ products – masturbators are becoming ever more popular, especially as men are now becoming far more open when it comes to buying/using/talking about sex toys.
So without further ado – let’s take a look at my Top Picks of 2014 – The Male Masturbator Edition!
Score: 10 out of 10
Special Requirements: Needs to be used with a Magic Wand that has a circumference of 7.5″
This little beauty won me over with it’s sheer simplicity. The Magic Wand is one of the best selling vibrators world wide, and it’s not difficult to see why – with nearly unmatched power, it’s got people curling their toes and screaming out in pleasure up and down the country. For a long time, I assumed that there was no real pleasure a man could achieve using a device like this. How very wrong I was. But now, to make things EVEN better, there is now a specific ‘man only’ attachment that turns the already brilliant Wand into a fucking amazing piece of equipment. This is a complete winning combination – the way the wand makes the sleeve shake, rattle and roll as it surrounds your manhood is incredible, and the combined texture and vibration has me achieving orgasm in record time each and every time I use it – and half the time I’m not even hard! Using the combination of the Wand, the Sleeve and some restraints, you can settle yourself down for some forced orgasm play. The sparks are guaranteed to fly, so it’s not hard (well, it will be) to see why this is the top rated toy of 2014 for me.
Score: 9 out of 10
RRP: £54.99 (but can be found cheaper if you look!)
Special Requirements: Need to make sure you stock up on renewer powder!
I honestly didn’t think a Fleshlight would ever make it onto my end of year list. I had such a love/hate relationship with them for a long time. The reason? Well they are big and cumbersome to hold, and frankly a bit of a pain to maintain – but, the orgasms this will deliver makes it all worth it. The ‘Ice’ range are a revelation, especially for those of us who like to see everything that’s going on. Honestly, just the sight of my husband sliding in and out of this device was enough to have me clutching at my chest, and feeling flushed. The texture inside this is one of the best I’ve seen in a Fleshlight – in fact, in any masturbator. So for now, I am totally in love with Fleshlight again…
Score: 8.5 out of 10
Special Requirements: N/A
This was, without a doubt, my husbands favourite toy of the year; closely followed by the original power stroker. Combining the aesthetics of a Fleshlight with some intense vibrations had him smiling from ear-to-ear. To be fair, the original power stroker was a treat and certainly helped me to fully discover the joy of having vibrations ‘down there’. However, it wouldn’t have made the list due to the fact that it needed some major work to make it become a contender – the main being it was a complete bugger to clean, and it wasn’t waterproof. Then along came the Hydro – it addressed all of the issues that I had with the original, and this put it as a serious contender. The removable textured sleeve transmits those vibrations better than before, and it’s now completely waterproof so you can take it in the bath/shower (and the added suction cup makes this a breeze) and it makes it easier to clean and look after. It looks funky, it’s surprisingly quiet and it feels amazing. What more do you want?
Score: 8 out 10
Materials: Silicone/ABS Plastic
Special Requirements: N/A
Stylised as the first ‘guybrator’ – the PULSE was a definite surprise hit. Once you get past the initial hilarity of the shape (it really does look like something Darth Vader would have in his bedside table), what you have is a uniquely versatile and powerful toy. The PULSE is designed not only for solo use, but for use with a partner as well. The toy ‘Oscillates’ rather than vibrates – meaning those sensations are felt deeper and stronger. The toy can be used ‘hands-free’ as well – just slip it on and lay back, and let the PULSE do all the work. It was amazing slipping into the PULSE flaccid, and then letting the oscillations bring me to a fully aroused state in mere seconds. It really is a sophisticated piece of kit.
WORST MASTURBATOR OF 2014
It’s not always been peaches and cream. This year, I had the dubious pleasure of trying out some of the worst male sex toys. The Rocks-Off Hand Solo and the Paso Close2You were serious contenders for the worst toy of the year. But when I had a look back at all of the products I’ve reviewed this year, there was one that stood out (painfully) in my memory…
The Zini Bang Bang Male Masturbator. I bought this toy because at the time, it sounded like an amazing idea. And look at it! It looks so space-age and funky – as if Apple had started manufacturing sex toys. I awaited eagerly for it to arrive, and within hours I was eagerly awaiting to send the bloody thing back.
In our house, the device became affectionately known as the ‘knob blender’ – and since then, I have been very distrusting of any toy that claims to ‘rotate’ as I end up having PTSD-style flashbacks.
If you still feel so inclined to give this demonic device a whirl, you can purchase it now from Bloke Toys for the princely sum of £119.99.
I never reviewed the toy on the blog as this was bought, tested and returned before the blog existed – so the only review I have is the product review left over at the Lovehoney website.
Here are some choice excerpts from my review over at Lovehoney:
The initial sensation was quite pleasant. I moved the speed up and down, and the sensations were enhanced and softened accordingly. So everything was find during the first 2 settings (clockwise, counter-clockwise) – so I moved on to one of the more varied patterns.. and this is where it went horrendously wrong.
With the sudden change in clockwise to counter-clockwise, to back again – I yelped a little bit. It initially felt like it was trying to rip my member off! In a mild state of panic, I thought I should apply more lube (even though the chamber was saturated) and I went to slide out – and I yelped some more. Somehow (and I’m sure an experienced physicist can probably explain this) but this unit produced a ridiculous amount of suction – so much so that I couldn’t pull out. I felt like I was wedged in. I had to pull extremely hard to get back out again – in fact, my husband had to help me. After a minute or so, it finally relented and let my poor chap go – not before making an awfully loud and rude noise – and I popped out.
It didn’t get much better after that. So thank you, Zini, for producing one of the most terrifying masturbation devices I have ever used. Bravo!
So over to you: What was your favourite masturbation toy of the year? Do you agree with any of my choices? Hit me up in the comments below or send us a message on twitter @thebiggayreview.
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