One thing I have been super conscious of doing, is making sure we reviewed some more bondage style products. I don’t think you even need to be a serious bondage player to bring in a few simple restraints into the bedroom. They can really enhance your play times.
So when Bondage Bunnies got in touch and asked if I would consider reviewing something for them, I was more than happy to oblige. Bondage Bunnies is ‘one of the UK’s largest online sex stores specialising in bondage equipment and sex toys’. They offer discreet delivery, which is free when you spend over £35. The item I chose was the ‘Sex & Mischief Spread The Love Bar‘.
This item was sent to me for review by Bondage Bunnies free of charge in exchange for my honest review.
My package from BB arrived in a plain unmarked brown box, ensuring delivery was completely discreet. It had arrived within 48 hours of despatch as well, so I didn’t have to wait too long. Inside was the S&M Spread The Love Bar. This is a spreader bar – designed to hold the legs open slightly during use. This particular bar also features two wrist restraints as well. The packaging is a simple cardboard box, featuring a scantily-clad model wearing the restrains around her ankles, whilst looking extremely coy. It does nothing for me, but i’m sure there are plenty out there who will appreciate the saucy (but tasteful) imagery.
The bar is made from carbon fibre, which is coated in a nylon webbing. The cuffs are attached via stitching and are made from a mix of polyester and velboa fabric. Velcro is used to adjust and secure the restraints. Inside the cuffs, the material is soft, and slightly fluffy, so should be comfortable and feel nice against the skin. The bar measures 15 inches (38cms) in length. It’s extremely lightweight and is a lot smaller than I had anticipated, and as a burly 6 foot something man with a few extra pounds, I could already see that this might not be the right product for me. But you can but try.
The bar is easy to use, and even with my slightly larger man-cankles, the ankle restraints closed comfortably and securely. Whilst they didn’t really ‘spread’ my ankles as much as I would have liked, they definitely held me secure. The whole point of a spreader bar is to restrict your movement, allowing your dom/domme/top to ravage your body at their whim and you can’t do anything about it. Throw in some hand-cuffs or alternative wrist/arm restraints, and you are completely helpless (but in a good way).
You can flip it around and use the ankle restraints as wrist restraints. Again, used this way, it keeps the arms from moving around (although I found it’s not as comfortable to lay there with your arms in this, as it is with the legs). But this is a personal preference. Of course, the big draw here is being able to have someone strapped in by both their ankles AND their wrists, for total domination. And it is possible. Just.
I envision that this bar is definitely made for those of a much smaller, lighter (and possibly shorter) frame. So, I got into the bed and the Mr attached the bar to my ankles. So far, so good. I’m now in a kneeling position and thrusting my arms between my legs as far as they’ll go so he can somehow, strap my wrists in. At this point, i’m cursing my love of all things chocolate, as my tummy gets in the way and stops me from reaching as far as I possibly could. With the MR pulling at my arms as well, we eventually made it, and he secured me into position. And this is where I panicked. I couldn’t move. At all. And I was lying face down, on the duvet… suffocating. Even tilting my head was not enough. I muffled ‘GET ME OUT OF HERE’ as loud as I could, whilst trying to not choke on duvet and saliva.
That was NOT comfortable. Or fun. At least for me, anyway. I don’t mind the general feeling of restriction, but this smaller bar pulled me in SO TIGHT, it was just too much for me. Am I going to let this put me off trying Spreader Bars again? No. Is it enough to put me off using this particular bar again? Yes. Yes it is. We tried to strap the Mr into the same position, and it just wasn’t happening. Unless you are slender enough like the model on the box, I fear this is a position many might struggle with. Instead, we got the Mr on his back and got him secured in that way, at which point this became less of a spreader bar, and more like a hog-tie – leaving you trussed up like a supermarket chicken. I was tempted to get the butter and just start smearing it all over. But it was late.
Unfortunately, after just a few explorations and experimentations, I noticed that the stitching holding one of the arm restraints on to the bar was quite loose. I fear a couple of tugs would have it come right off, which is more than likely to happen when using something like this. I know when i’m restrained, and the Mr decides he’ll take this opportunity to tease me with a tickler or a pin wheel, my arms and legs will be thrashing around. With that in mind, any time this DOES come out to play, then it will just be used round the ankles. They seemed to be far more sturdy.
Clean-up and Maintenance
Dependent on exactly how you use this, there should be nothing to do other than putting it away (either in it’s box, or somewhere safe like a bedside drawer or cabinet. Should you like to get messy and use things like oils during your sessions, i’d recommend a careful wipe down with a mildly damp cloth, and then leave it to dry before storing it away.
As it goes, my first real experience with a spreader bar wasn’t really a success. But this is not necessarily down to the fault of the bar itself – I just think a big hulking bear like myself, are not really who was envisioned as being an end-user when this was created. However, in certain situations, it did hold on my legs securely, it did spread them enough to create access and opportunities for the MR to get in and tease me with the various other little tools we have.
However, this is definitely something you would perhaps consider buying as a ‘try me’ – the quality is a little flimsy in general, and I doubt this would stand the test of a few good, vigorous sessions. However if you are unsure as to whether a spreader bar is right for you, then this is a cheap way of trying it out, and then should you find it works well for you, you can consider something a bit more sturdier and more expensive. But for newbies and those who want to keep their bondage on a budget, it’s an OK place to start.
Where To Buy
I would like to thank Bondage Bunnies for sending us this product free of charge in exchange for our honest review. All thoughts, opinions and experiences mentioned here are 100% genuine and our own. Affiliate links have not been used in this post.
The Lowdown | Sex & Mischief Spread The Love Bar
Pros: Cuffs are comfortable (soft on skin), Actual bar is sturdy and it restricts movement enough. Cheap.
Cons: Cheap means quality isn’t the best – cuff stitching is a bit loose, so not ideal for ‘rough’ sessions, and smaller size it not suitable for those of us who are curvy.
Bottom Line: As a spreader bar for beginners, it’s OK – it’s affordable and to some extent, it works as it should. But I think most people will look to find something bigger and better after one use.