I used to think that writing negative reviews was hard. I change my mind. It’s these types of reviews I find hardest to write; the ones where your kind of just ‘meh’ about a product. Not because it’s bad or anything; it just doesn’t get you off in the way that you like, and it’s just kind of.. meh.

Vibrating Masturbators are, generally speaking, few and far between. Sure, the number on the market has grown significantly over the last few years; but compared to the sheer number of standard manual masturbators, they are definitely out-numbered. Which is why I will always be excited about a new vibrating toy for the penis; and when I saw the Lovehoney Desire Luxury Rechargeable Male Vibrator (more on the name later), I knew I had to try it out.

I’ve had some experience with Lovehoney’s vibrating penis toys before; the O-Force (and it’s brother) had so much potential, but I felt they didn’t quite hit the mark. This toy looked like it had taken what HAD worked with the O-Force, and improved on it again. But sadly, for myself at least, it’s still not quite working for me. I will do my best to explain why, so let’s get on with it.

The Desire Luxury Rechargeable Male Vibrator was sent to us free of charge by Lovehoney in exchange for an honest review. 

First Impressions

The Desire Packaging is always pretty spot on. It’s understated but still feels luxury. Each toy in the range comes with a little storage pouch or case; and they’ve included little holes through which you can run your charging cable. This allows you to charge the toy from inside the case, giving a little more ‘discretion’; rather than just leaving it out on the bedside table. That’s pretty cool, so props to Lovehoney for that. The only downside is that you can’t see when it’s actually charged, but that’s a minor issue. 

The vibrator itself is made from silicone, and has a fair bit of heft to it, yet still feels comfortable in the hand. It measures 9 inches of total length and has an insertable canal of 6 inches, with a diameter at it’s widest point of 2.25 inches, that gets narrower as you get deeper. There are 3 motor, all placed at varying points to allow for optimum stimulation. A 3 hour charge should give around and hour or so of playtime. It’s waterproof for easy cleaning and shower fun, and USB rechargeable, making it the perfect travel companion.

There are a range of patterns, ranging from standard ‘constant’ vibrations to varying patterns that switch between the motors to create a unique experience. The vibrations are fairly strong and have a good level of rumble to them (I should hope so, with three motors!).

In Use

The Desire Male Vibrator (I understand why companies still choose to ‘gender’ toys, but come on; just label toys for where they are meant to be used. This is for anyone with a penis!) boasts three motors (yes, THREE!) and when switched on, there is certainly a decent amount of power coming from them. I was quietly confident that this was going to work and be AMAZING. My biggest problems with the O-Force’s, was that the canal was just far too wide, and the motors weren’t really hitting the right spots. It seems with this toy, Lovehoney have learned and crafted a canal that’s narrow, but also deeper – designed to encapsulate as much of the penis as possible.

Sure, the opening is still pretty wide, but the internal canal gets narrower, and has little bumps (which I’m assuming is where the motors are) so it does feel like this one is actually trying to hold onto you. And this in turn, allows those vibrations to work their way all around the silicone, so you can feel those vibrations all throughout the penis. This also means that you can sort of… stroke with it; sure it sounds hella squelchy; like a really sloppy blow job, but some people like that.

As I’m writing this, it all sounds amazing and wonderful, and like I should pop my load within seconds of getting it side. Sadly, my experience with the Desire Male Vibrator have been a little more on the lacklustre side. Don’t get me wrong, the vibrations are indeed quite nice, and they do reverberate all through my shaft. But I don’t know… it just feels like there is something missing. It feels very nice and I lay there for half an hour and just enjoy the sensation, but it just never gets me any further than that. As soon as I stop and return to my hand, then the orgasm comes almost instantly. But I can never seem to ‘push myself over the edge’ whilst using the Desire. It’s actually very frustrating.

I’ve tried comparing it to other vibrating masturbators that I have enjoyed; to see if I can work out why this one isn’t quite working for me. With the likes of the RISE and the PULSE; the vibrations are pretty much SPOT-ON my frenulum, and that’s what get’s me off quickest. With the Desire, they just don’t quite feel like it’s hitting the right spot, even when I jam myself in there as much as possible. But then I look at thinks like the Doxy and the Hummer; that’s not technically applying direct stimulation to my frenulum; that is more of a general all purpose kind of stimulation; and yet it still brings me to orgasm within seconds. This is most likely down to the snug fit of the hummer and the sheer power of the Doxy. And the Desire doesn’t have either of those things, really.

But I think what really bums me out to the most, is that there are 8 reviews for this product on the site; and they all pretty much RAVE about it. But there’s me, sat in the corner, waving this thing around like ‘Huh? Hello? Are you going to work, please?’.  Am I broken? I have used this several times now, and have yet to actually use it to completion. However, I am not going to give up. I am going to keep trying. And hey, if we make a breakthrough; I’ll come back and update. But for now, I am not completely sold. I also have concerns that those who are on the girthier side (let’s say 6 inches or more) may find this a tad ‘too’ snug. I am of average size and found it comfortable, but if you are nearing above average proportions, you enjoyment of this maybe limited. 

Clean-up & Maintenance

The Desire Male Vibrator is completely waterproof, so clean-up should be easy. I did notice that it’s quite tricky to get your fingers deep into the canal to ensure everything is fully rinsed out. Or that’s just my stubby fingers… but either way, the best I could do was to just thoroughly rinse it out like I would a glass. You could always invest in a little bottle brush if you wanted to be absolutely certain that all lube and fluids are removed. You can then towel dry it, or just let it air dry before putting it back in it’s storage bag.

The Desire Male Vibrator also has a travel lock function, so if you do want to take it around with you, you can have the peace of mind that it’s not just going to turn itself on accidentally whilst it’s being moved around!

Summary

So here’s the tea; like, I do think that generally speaking, this is an OK toy. It clearly works for some people; and this is true with almost any sex toy. What works for one, may not work for another – so your mileage may vary. The build quality is good, and I love the storage bag and it’s discreet charging function; that’s pretty awesome.

The vibrations do feel nice, and the patterns are fairly decent as well. But I just wish I could explain why this toy doesn’t get me off. For me, I guess this is a nice ‘foreplay’ kind of toy; like it can get me in the mood for other stuff, but it’s not the main event. And I guess that’s OK too; but as I mentioned earlier; I’ll keep at it and hey, you never know what might happen.

Where To Buy

You can order your Desire Luxury Rechargeable Male Vibrator directly from Lovehoney (RRP £79.99)

I would like to thank Lovehoney for sending us the Desire Luxury Rechargeable Male Vibrator to us free of charge, in exchange for an honest review. This does not affect our thoughts or opinions of this or any other product we receive for review. There are affiliate links in this post. If you wish to support the blog, please consider making your purchases through these links!