Another day, another dildo review. This time we’re hopping on to RoboCock! Ok, that’s not its actual name but it probably should be. For folks that love the idea of a fantasy dildo, but aren’t comfortable with the ‘animal’ shapes; this might be just what you are looking for.
Last time, we looked at the super textured Scimitar; and I loved it. But its curves and swerves could be a tad intimidating for some. So whilst perusing all of the dildos available over at Mr Hankey’s Toys; I spotted the Sex Machine; a dildo that was your classic phallic shape but featured some interesting ‘cyborg’ inspired texture that is sure to thrill without being overwhelming. At least that’s what I was hoping. I guess we’ll have to put it to the test and see…
The Sex Machine was sent to us free of charge by Hankey’s Toys in exchange for an honest review. Some affiliate links have been used in this post.
First Impressions
Much like before, when it came to picking which Sex Machine dildo I wanted, I had to opt for the smallest size. But let’s just make it clear; their idea of small is very different to mine! It still looks pretty big. I chose mine in Med Firm and in Gunmetal Grey although it looks much darker than the website suggests; but there is definitely a subtle silver sheen to it. It’s not the end of the world – it still looks pretty cool.
For those needing the stats; the Sex Machine is 9.4 inches in height and has a circumference of 5.75 inches around the tip which widens to 6.4 inches towards the middle. As it gets to the base, it becomes an eye-watering (at least for me) 8.25 inches. It has a usable length of 8.1 inches and is compatible with strap-on O-Rings with a diameter of 2.5 inches. The shaft is pretty straight and is textured to look like pistons and tubes. This will be the largest dildo we have tried from both Mr Hankey’s and in general; so I can’t lie – I was a bit nervous.
In Use
I knew this was going to be a slow-build up – I’m certainly not at a point where I could just dive right in with a dildo of this size. I need a good and proper warm-up before I can even consider taking on a beast like this. It’s important to remember that when using larger size toys; you need to take it slow and really listen to what your body is telling you. Which is why my first attempt with the Sex Machine didn’t really go the way that I had hoped. I warmed up with both the Perfect Penis and the Captains Hook before moving on to the Sex Machine.
Insertion was initially a bit tricky but we did get there. But as I inserted deeper, it was just painful and I couldn’t get comfortable. I got frustrated and I put it down to not really being in the right frame of mind. I’ve had some other health concerns that have been distracting me; so I just was not ready to attempt this. So I admitted defeat but vowed I would return at a later date. I just needed to work on me a little bit before I attempted again.
A couple of weeks later, I’m back and following my usual warm-up routine; but I am really taking my time with it. I’ve got some arousing entertainment on my phone; I’m lubed up to the nines and I’m feeling a bit more relaxed than I have been. Insertion was still not quite as easy as I would have hoped; but it was more comfortable this time. I had to take it slow as it stretched my hole and left me feeling incredibly full. I was beginning to wonder if I should have gone for this in a softer density (which is another great tip for working with larger dildos).
I couldn’t quite make it all the way to the bottom – I’m just not well practised enough yet, and also I don’t want to push myself further than I feel comfortable with. However with a good 6 inches of length in me, it still felt comfortable; and I was able to thrust with it; however just due to the slightly larger size – I wasn’t quite so vigorous as I might have been. The texture is noticeable but compared to the Scimitar; it feels pretty basic. It certainly does offer a little more in terms of sensation so those that like the idea of texture but don’t want too much – I think this is a nice middle ground.
Clean-up and Maintenance
Much like the Scimitar, just a little extra attention should be paid to all the little nooks and crannies to ensure everything is clean. You should know the drill by now, but if it’s your first time here – let me clue you in! Your silicone dildos can be cleaned in numerous ways – whatever works best for you. The quick and simple approach is a good rinse with some warm, soapy water (maybe a spritz of antibacterial toy cleaner) and then allow it to dry before storing away. A great option for when discretion is important.
Don’t need to worry about being discreet? Then you can pop it in the dishwasher (top rack, no detergent and don’t put your dirty plates in as well!). Fancy making dildo soup? Then you can boil it in water on the stove top or sanitize it in a 10% bleach solution (making sure to give it a thorough rinse afterwards and before your next use). Whatever option fits your lifestyle best – you can’t go wrong! And you can safely store these with other silicone dildos without issue.
Summary
So reviews like this one are always a little bit more difficult to score. In terms of the quality of the toy; it’s look, texture and build – it’s another winner. All of their dildos so far have been crafted with a level of care and detail that justifies their significant price tag. These are toys that are designed to last. I do think this is certainly geared towards a more advanced player – I don’t consider myself a nOOb; but I did have a little bit of a struggle getting to a point where I could use this one comfortably.
My biggest take-away from all this is: always, ALWAYS check the measurements before ordering. And if you are going for a size larger than you would normally consider; got for a softer option(!). I’m not going to give up though; as they say practice makes perfect. I’m just not going to rush for perfection.
Where to Buy
You can order your Sex Machine from Mr Hankey’s Toys direct. It’s available in 4 sizes.
Shopping from the UK? Clonezone are the official UK stockist of Mr Hankey’s and you can pick up all four sizes, including the Small.
The Sex Machine was sent to us free of charge by Hankey’s Toys in exchange for an honest review. Some affiliate links have been used in this post. Some affiliate links have been used in this post. This does not sway our opinion of this or any other product we receive for review. If you wish to help support the blog, please share this post with someone you think would find it interesting!
The Lowdown | Sex Machine by Mr Hankey’s Toys
Pros: ‘Realistic’ shape, decent texture
Cons: Not for the feint of heart
Bottom Line: If you are looking to level up your anal play; this is great place to start – it’s just a little out of my comfort zone for the time being.
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