I remember a time, when a sex doll was just a piece of PVC you blew up with air; it looked absolutely NOTHING like a person; and you were essentially shagging a pool floaty. But those days are well and truly gone.

In case you haven’t been following along on our Twitter, a couple months back, I was approached by a website called DollTraining; who were interested in having us review a male sex doll. Initially, I was completely in disbelief. Who in their right mind would give away a fully fledged sex doll for review? This had to be too good to be true. I also didn’t know what my husband would think if I just agreed and one actually turned up on our doorstep! A hand-held masturbator is one thing, but a doll?

After conducting some due diligence to ensure the legitimacy of the offer; it was time to break the news to the husband; to see what he thought. “Oh dear god” he said. That soon quickly paved way to “Well, it could be interesting.. if a little weird” before settling on “Where the hell would be even store it?”. After much soul-searching and negotiation; we agreed.. and before we knew it, towards the end of January, our new companion was being made.

Choosing our new ‘Friend’

I’ll cover more about the order process during our final review; but for now, just know that we chose a base model (a Male WM Doll with a #78 head, along with a #207 head for good measure). It is 175cm tall (around 5ft 9) and weights 57kg. This was the part that I paid the least amount of attention too. 57kg didn’t seem all that heavy… famous last words.

Anyway; we received some photos of our doll in the factory – this allows you to check you are happy with the doll before shipment. This is especially helpful if you are having a custom doll made (as you can change many things, like hair colour, eye colour, skin tone etc) so if you aren’t too happy about something, it’s easier to make changes before sending.

Doll Delivery

Once we confirmed, we soon received our shipping notification, and confirmation of an estimated delivery date (it was shipped via FedEX). The nerves were really starting to kick in now. What have we agreed too? How was I going to feel when it actually arrived? Was it going to make things weird between me and David? So many unanswered questions.

There was a small delay with the delivery; our doll was shipped just as China were going into their Lunar New Year celebrations; but after a few days hanging around a sort facility, it was finally on the move; and it raced through Europe. To Koeln, to Paris, to Stansted to… my home. All in a matter of days.

I had awoken early on the day of it’s arrival; because past experience with my FedEx deliveries is that they usually turn up super early. On this fateful Monday, it actually arrived at a semi-decent 9:45am. There was a knock on the door, and my stomach dropped. Oh god; here we go. I opened the door; and the courier simply said “I need your help offloading this. It’s f**king heavy”. Oh christ, I thought to myself. So I grabbed my slippers and headed out with him to his van. Remember how I said I gave no second thought to the weight of the doll?

He climbed in the back; we were either his last stop of this round, or we were the ONLY round; but there it was. Lying in what can only be described as a cardboard sarcophagus. “What’s in there then, mate? A trampoline or something?”. Not that it’s any of his business… “Erm, of sorts” I said. Then realised that sounded a bit weird, so said “No, it’s some bedroom furniture – but I ordered it from Wish, hence why it’s come from China”. That was believable, right? No? Well he didn’t question it. Although had he paid close attention to the customs declaration thats taped onto the box, we would have seen that it was a ‘doll scale model resembling a human being’. Thankfully, the rest of the packaging was completely non-descript.

Now we had to try and get it out of the van. I grabbed one end and went to pull. And it didn’t move. What? I tried again, and it moved a couple of mm at best. “See, told you it was f**king heavy!” he said. With the driver pushing the box from one end, and me grabbing the other, we got it out of the van. It was now standing upright in the middle of the road. “Christ” I muttered to myself. David was still in bed at this point, so had no idea of the laurel-and-hardy antics going on in the middle of the street. After much huffing and puffing, we got it to my front door. “Just put down on the floor here” I panted. Thankfully, my hallway is tiled. All I had to do was slide it from the front door, into the living room. Dripping with sweat and majorly out of breath, I collapsed on the box. It’s here. Now what?

“Well how the hell does anyone use one of these alone?”

I awoke the husband to let him know that our new friend has arrived. I was saving unboxing it until he was around (mainly because I was going to need his help!). After a cup of tea to calm our nerves (yes, we are frightfully british); it was time to begin the unboxing. It was taped up pretty securely, but once it was open, I was surprised to see how well packaged it was. Full padded, even travelled with a soft fleece blanket. Was that to help keep it warm? I imagine those cargo holds on planes can get pretty chilly; and afterall, it was travelling naked.

As we removed the top layer, there it was. Wrapped in a plastic bag. Everything looked as it should. There were 4 additional ‘bags’ inside. The first bag I picked up was… well, it was a bag of dicks. 2 dicks. I didn’t realise the doll came with multiple dicks. But there were of 2 different sizes, and designs. One was shorter and more veiny, whilst the other was longer and smoother. Both are quite slim in circumference. They also have rods inside, so they can be repositioned. And they were also very squishy and incredibly satisfying to squeeze. But I digress..

Inside the next bag was a whole bunch of accessories. There was a vest (which, weirdly, is sized for a child), a USB Hole Warmer, A Douche (which i’m guessing is for assistance with cleaning), 2 wigs (as we had 2 heads), a comb and a pair of gloves (which again, I haven’t figured out exactly what they are for but i’ll let you know in a later post). The final 2 bags were… well, they were the heads. At this point, things were starting to feel a bit ‘serial killer-esque’ as I pulled out the first head from the bag. Out of the 2 heads, the #207, with blue eyes was looking the most appealing. It’s also slightly larger than the #78. They heads are made with a firm resin ‘skull’ and then coated with the TPE. It gives them a really satisfying ‘dual density’ feel. Each head has a penetrable orifice, and is decorated with eyebrows, some false eyelashes.

It was time. All we had to do now, was free the body. Now, it’s no secret i’m not the fittest person in the world (we are working on it, though). But I was struggling lifting this body. Even with the help of my husband; it’s just so unyielding and… squishy! With a lot of swearing, laughing and sweating, we were finally able to get it out of the box and into a chair. “Well now what?” we looked at each other. We settled for the #207 head with the white wig and honestly, once it’s all together, it looks pretty decent.

“How on earth do people use these on their own?” I said to David; as I looked at his red face, brow moist with sweat. “How on earth are WE going to use it?” he countered, as I too wiped at my face. Deciding it was looking a bit too vulnerable in the chair, we decided to put on the supplied vest, which was another new struggle. And then that’s where we left it. Just sat, chilling on a dining chair, in the middle of the lounge. “We’ll get it upstairs later” I said. “HOW?” came the reply. I hadn’t really thought about that, but it was a long way off… we’ll cross that bridge when we get there.

For several hours, it sat in the chair, and I couldn’t stop staring at it. It’s so surreal; when they say ‘lifesize’, there is a part of you that’s like “Oh but it can’t really be lifesize, right?”. It’s literally 3 inches shorted than me. It’s lifesize. We goofed around a little. Whilst David went to the bathroom, I decided to try and move the doll, and positioned it bending over the table. This was a struggle by myself, but we did it. It was here we discovered how… smackable… the doll was. That bottom… it made a satisfying sound when you spanked it. I’m also jealous. I wish my butt looked like that. There was also a side effect of.. well, forgetting it was there. So every now and again, I would leave the room for a few minutes (whether that was to go to the bathroom or make a cup of tea), and everytime I would come back into the room, it would make me jump. David experienced the same.

The Struggle is real

After a few hours spent staring, poking, prodding and squeezing; we decided it was time to get it upstairs. Now, if you’ve ever tried to carry someone who is completely drunk, you might be familiar with the following struggle. Trying to get hold of the doll (which at this point has now been named Sven) is just.. awkward. Because he’s so SQUISHY. And is basically a dead weight. With great difficulty, we got him up the first flight of steps. But then we had to put him down. It was just not easy getting him up them. So I had to resort to wrapping Sven in a blanket, and basically ‘dragged’ him up the stairs. We got him onto the bed and collapsed next to him. Queue another 20 minutes of poking, prodding and squeezing. I’m sorry, Sven. Then, with a little more effort, we wrestled him back into his box for safekeeping. These dolls requite the greatest of care, more of which we will cover in later posts. But for now, it was time for Sven to go to bed…

So What Now?

Of course, the ultimate goal is to get down and get funky with Sven. However there’s a few things we need to do first. Of course, we are going to give it a thorough clean and repowder before our first use. I also suggested we spend a couple of days, just getting used to moving and carrying him around, and getting it into positions/testing the movement before we got ‘intimate’. Because no lie; once i’ve shifted him around, the last thing I want to do is get it on.

So you can expect many updates over the coming weeks as we adjust to live with a new sex doll. We’ll be trying to look at all aspects of own a doll; from the physical (sensual) side, to the emotional and mental side. If you have any questions you would like to see answered as part of this new Doll Diaries series, then please leave them in the comments below or you can send us a message. I hope you enjoyed this introduction; and look forward to sharing more with you again soon.

For now, stay safe, wash your hands and wear a mask.

Much love to you all.