Monogamy – A Hot Affair Board Game

I’m always looking for new ways to spice things up in the bedroom.

Admittedly I’ve spent a lot of time, money and effort buying various lotions, potions and toys to help jazz things up in the bedroom, that I think I’ve forgotten what’s really important. Of course, we both love using the lotions and toys etc – but sometimes, you just want to rein things in a little bit, but still have fun with it. We were going away for a romantic weekend, and thought it might be nice to try and get something special to take away with us, and I spent hours browsing Lovehoney before settling on grabbing a sexy board game.

I had been looking at this game for a while – it promises to reignite the passion, whilst providing a fun experience. I was concerned that it wouldn’t be suitable for a male/male couple, and to some extent, I was right – however we managed to find fun ways around it, and it certainly was a very fun experience indeed.

First Impressions

There’s not much to say really – it is packaged like your typical board game (although this certainly isn’t one to be playing with the family on Christmas Day). Inside the box is: A game board, 2 game pieces, 12 progress counters, 1 dice, a set of intimate question/task cards, a set of passionate question/task cards, a set of steamy question/task cards and a set of fantasy cards. It’s a very simple game to play, and plays like any other board game – you roll the dice, move your counter, complete the task/action depicted on the square, and the first person to go round the board six times wins. It’s simple. That’s the basics of the game.

How to play

Firstly, it helps to really set the mood. We were lucky enough to be spending the week away in a log cabin, surrounded by trees and nature with a log burning stove. So we lit some candles, lit the fire, poured a glass (or two) of wine and got down to playing. The first time round we did just a ‘dummy’ run just to see how it would work. The second time round, I was in it to win it. But more on that later.

To start the game, the manual suggests staring lovingly into each others eyes and the first person to blink loses. But you could do whatever you want. You roll the dice, and move your piece. Dependent on what square you land on, you will have to do a certain action or task. You start on ‘Pink’ level (Intimate) meaning each question/task is to ease you in gently, before progressing to ‘Passionate’ and then ‘Steamy’.

There are several different square types: A Shoe, Plain Heart, Drink, Food, Lips, Erotic Dancing, Massage Parlour, Erogenous Zone and the Monogamy square. The Shoe square requires you to lose an item of clothing. The plain heart square is your opportunity to take a break and do whatever you wish. The Drink square simply allows you to have a well-earned drink. If you land on the Food (Strawberry) Square, then dependent on which level you are currently on, you will have to eat something seductively, feed your partner or eat something off them (so it’s a good idea to make sure you have some little nibbles to hand!). The lips square requires you to give your partner a kiss on the cheek, a full smacker on the lips or a full blown french kiss. For those who might be a little shy, the erotic dancing square maybe a little awkward – but for one minute, you will either do a little dance with your clothes on, be a bit more suggestive or give your partner a strip show. The massage parlour square entitles you to receive a head/shoulder massage, a back or leg massage or if you are in the steamy round, a full on genital massage. All for 2 minutes. Lastly, there’s the erogenous zone – based on a dice roll, you will either have to stroke, kiss or nibble and suck a body part. There’s a lot to take in there already, so this is one occasion where I would suggest you do read the rules quickly before you get into the game – it sort of spoils the mood if you have to go back and read what you are supposed to do.

Picking up the  ‘Monogamy’ cards is where it starts to get really interesting. When you land on the Monogamy square, you take a card for what level you are playing and there will be ‘His’ and ‘Hers’ questions or tasks. On the Intimate level, it’s usually questions to help you learn more about each other, or it will be a little task like kissing or cuddling for a couple of minutes. As you move up to the ‘Passionate’ level, the questions and tasks become a bit more involved and much ruder. Finally, the ‘Steamy’ round really ups the ante and gets much more explicit.

Some of the tasks are not to be completed during game play. These tasks are called ‘Treats’ and are meant to be carried out in the week after you’ve played the game, to keep the fun going. This could range from surprising your partner with a meal in a restaurant, to sending them a naughty text whilst they are at work. Sometimes it will ask you to keep it a secret – to help heighten the anticipation!

As you go round the board, when you pass go, you collect a ‘Fantasy’ card. These cards depict various situations and scenarios. You collect a card each time you go, however you can only hold 2 cards at any one time, so when you pass go for the third time, you have to discard one of the fantasy cards. At the end of the game, whoever has won, chooses one of their fantasy cards, and the idea is that you then go away and act out on the fantasy.

Our Experience

As I mentioned earlier, we originally did a dummy run, to see how well it would work with a male/male couple. The game states that it’s suitable for any couple, however a lot of the questions/tasks were gender specific, so we either had to improvise or choose a different card. I had fully prepared for this eventuality, and had a set of Sex Dice handy. When we were unable to complete a task (i.e we landed on the food square and had no food) or we were unable to complete the task on the card, we rolled the sex dice instead and would carry out whatever the result was for 2 minutes.

In all fairness, we did find that most of the time we were able to navigate between the ‘His’ and ‘Hers’ questions and was still able to have an extremely fun game. I did have to laugh at some of the tasks, usually ‘Her’ tasks. The 2 that stuck out in my mind involved a mobile phone being inserted somewhere, and then being called. The other involved a strawberry and some face sitting.

When we finished the first game, despite the fact we hadn’t really been playing it properly, we did find ourselves in the bedroom to finish off what was started – and it was amazing. The second time we played, we were properly going for it. We had wine, there was some erotic entertainment on the TV, and the passion and the tension was building – the time limits were a real tease, and just as you were getting into something, it was time to move on – by the time we finished the game and declared a winner, we immediately ripped each others clothes off and went at it on the sofa in front of the fire. Again, another mind-blowing session. So whilst we didn’t act out the fantasy (like we should have) we banked those to be used another time.

It’s interesting because I like to think I know pretty much everything there is to know about my husband – and lo and behold I was surprised to learn new things. And it was all in good fun. I now know that if I was to have a tattoo, my husband would prefer it to be on my lower back, and to be of a dragon. He knows that If he was to be pierced, I would love to have his eye brow pierced. If we were to visit an escort (or have them visit us) we both agreed that we would have a threesome, rather than have an individual session. I also need to invest in a sex swing… I just don’t know where to put it.

Re-Playability

There are other 400 different scenarios and questions, and baring in mind in any one game, we maybe only got to use 2 cards each from each level, there are still loads of questions and tasks to do, so each time you play the game, it’s going to be a different experience each time. In fact, we’ve removed the cards we’ve already done, just so we don’t get them again.

Despite the fact there were a few obvious places where we physically couldn’t complete a certain task, with some creative editing, we were able to ‘amend’ the tasks to be more relevant to us.

Summary

As I mentioned at the top of the review, I’d become complacent on trying to spice things up continuously through the use of toys and lubes and lotions. I’d forgotten the simpler things – and that you don’t need a bucket load of silicone and batteries to have a wonderful time (although don’t get me wrong, I still love my toys). ‘Monogamy’ allowed us to connect on a level that we hadn’t done for a very long time, but also, it helped create a new spark of passion that has led to several mind-blowing sessions in the bedroom. I feel closer to my husband than ever before. We did have so much fun answering the questions, carrying out the tasks, and to be honest, even if we didn’t end up in the bedroom, I still would have felt satisfied, because of the connection this game helped create.

It’s not perfect – some of the questions might be completely ridiculous (one task has you have your partner stand face against the wall, and you approach them with a cucumber and your erect penis, and they have to guess what it is that you’ve inserted inside them – you did read that correctly) – but it’s all harmless fun and if it helps rekindle the spark and passion in the bedroom, then I’m all for it. I’m looking forward to playing the game again tonight.

Where to Buy:

Lovehoney