I love sticking things up my bum. Let’s be honest, and not sugar coat anything. Prostate stimulation is just about the best thing in the world, EVER.
So many toys I have, have promised to give me the best gosh-darned prostate massage, and so many of them fail. Especially the ‘vibrating’ ones. So after reading an extremely positive review for this particular toy, I was intrigued. But the hefty price tag put me off slightly… The last time I took a gamble on an expensive toy like that, was when I ordered the Zini Bang Bang Rotating Male Masturbator (or the Knob Blender, as I somewhat affectionately refer to it. See the review HERE) and that ended in tears.
Thankfully, as it was fast approaching the bank holiday weekend, Lovehoney decided to send out 25% discounts, and naturally I jumped at the chance! So I placed my order and eagerly awaited the arrival. Was it going to live up to it’s expectations? Was I going to be grossly disappointed? Is this another toy that has more style than substance…?
First Impressions
L’Amourose is not a brand I am familiar with at all, but I knew I was in for something special, just by the packaging alone. The box is a smooth, matte black with gold writing, and the logo is shiny gold foil. When you open up, you’re greeted by a little black bow, which when you pull, removes the internal keepsake box. After removing the lid, you are greeted by the Rosa, sat on its black diamond charger dock, held on by a little piece of black ribbon. Underneath the charger dock is the plug, a velvet storage back, instructions and a warranty card. It really is wonderfully put together.
The Rosa is a delight to hold. It’s coated in smooth, seam-free, body-safe silicone. The tip is firm and has a slender, flexible neck. At the base of the Rosa, is the operational buttons. These are ‘soft touch’ and blend into the silicone, but they are raised ever so slightly, so you can still feel where they are. On the bottom, they continue the black diamond theme, with an oval plastic base that sits in the charger dock – there are 2 little gold points, which you need to align when charging. It has a nice solid weight to it, and it really does look and feel like an incredibly, high quality product. I am starting to understand the price tag now!
You will need to charge the Rosa before use, and this will take approximately 2-3 hours. When the Rosa is charging, a small light at the base of the unit will continually flash. Once the Rosa is fully charged, it will stop. It will also flash continually when it needs recharging. I could literally sit here and admire this beauty all day, but needs must… let’s get down to using it!
In Use
The Rosa is a 2-function toy, a G-Spot and Prostate Massager. As neither my husband nor myself have the relevant parts to test this out as a G-spot toy, I will be reviewing it as a prostate massager. The toy has an insertable length of about 5 inches, and at it’s widest point, has a girth of approx. 4.5 inches. With that in mind, I’d say this was best aimed at intermediate anal players and above. To warm up, I began by inserting a plug, and got myself relaxed and comfortable, whilst cycling through the vibrations and patterns. I won’t go into too much detail, as the previous review done that so well, but I was immediately blown away with how powerful the vibrations felt in my hand – even on the lowest setting.
There are 2 motors – one in the tip, which provides the prostate stimulation, and a motor in the base, which would provide external stimulation (in my case, against the perineum). The motors are also surprisingly quiet. Even when you ramp up the Rosa to full blast, it sounds like a really muffled electric toothbrush. So I would imagine that discreet use would be possible if you shut the door! Although fortunately that’s not a worry in this house.
Before long, I was eager to try out the toy, so I lubed up (using only water-based lube) and slowly slipped the Rosa inside. I was amazed at how comfortable it was. The flexible neck allows the toy to conform to your body shape. Now, the tricky part was turning the vibrations on – it’s not impossible, you just have to very carefully feel your way around. If it’s easier, you could ask a partner to do it, or you could find a pattern and then insert when it’s on. Luckily, I had a spare pair of hands on deck, so as I lay there, enjoying the full feeling the toy was giving me, my glamorous assistant turned it on. As soon as the Rosa buzzed into life, I clutched at the sheets. Even on its lowest setting, the vibrations in the tip of the motor were so incredibly deep; I was feeling it all throughout my body. This only intensified when the speed was increased. Oh my god… I lay there, squirming, and moaning… I couldn’t think of any other anal toy or vibrator (apart from the Magic Wand) that had this much power behind it.
Things got better when it was switched to an alternating mode, where the vibrations switched between the tip and the base. And then I instinctively ‘clenched’ the Rosa tightly… and then this was where I exploded. Literally. As I clenched the toy, this just amplified the already strong vibrations even more, and this finally tipped me over the edge. I haven’t had an orgasm that strong, or intense, for a very long time. Initially it was disorientating, but after catching my breath, I regained the ability to talk again. This is now, the favourite toy in my whole entire box of tricks.
Clean-up and Maintenance
The Rosa is completely waterproof, so clean up is a breeze. Simply wash under the tap with some toy cleaner, and then dry and you can either return it to the keepsake box, or you can pop it in the provided velvet pouch. As the toy is waterproof, this means you can take it in the bath and shower, so you don’t have to restrict your fun to the bedroom (brilliant!).
Summary
I must apologise for the long review, but everything about the Rosa is just amazing. Everything from the chic luxurious packaging, to the incredibly strong and deep vibrations. Everything just ticks all the boxes. There are so many toys on the market that claim to be luxury, or claim to be powerful. This is one toy that I am happy to say fulfils both of its promises, and I strongly believe that anybody who uses this toy will not be disappointed.
Where To Buy
It is with a heavy heart, I have to let you now that the ROSA, and the brand L’Amourose are no more!
The Lowdown | L’Amourose Rosa Extra Quiet G-Spot and Prostate Massager
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